Forgiveness Ought To Be Like A Cancelled Note

I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive. Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note - torn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one.
Henry Ward Beecher (1813 – 1887)

How does one really forgive and forget and let go? I cannot keep going on and on about this. I want to forgive, I decided to forgive, yet I am harboring all this anger. I keep on bringing up the issue that rocked our relationship. While I don't think I will ever erase it from my mind, I need to put it away and not keep flinging it in her face.

I was angry with Dara yesterday and said some mean hurtful things. Why? Maybe the bourbon had something to do with it. All that Maker's Mark.

The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Mahatma Gandhi (1869 - 1948)

I should be strong. It occurs to me not that I was probably so afraid of commitment because I knew that I was not strong enough to survive getting hurt again. The breakup of my marriage devastated me and I did not want to go there ever again.

I wish I was an easier person to manage. I need to get a grip. I mean, I am me so why can I not manage me?

I also need to stop feeling so goddamn sorry for myself.